On Remembering

Amid the hundreds of other holidays Ukraine has this month, Remembrance Day stands as one of the more somber occasions. Not unlike Mexico’s Day of The Dead, people gather at the graves of loved ones, celebrate the lives they lived, and miss them.

I like this holiday. We don’t have one like it in America, as far as I know. We have Memorial Day, but what about those who died without banners waving? I suppose it’s up to us to remember them in our own way, on a day of our choosing. Maybe it would be their birthday, or their anniversary, or the day they died.

I hope Ukraine doesn’t mind, but I’m going to borrow their holiday for a minute and remember someone today who recently passed away.

My Grandmother – or Yia-Yia, in Greek – died in my absence almost two months ago. It’s a strange thing when death happens without you. You’ve already gone without the person for so long that when someone calls you and says that you must now go on without them forever, it feels unreal. Like you’ll return in a year and a half to find them right where you left them, still sitting in the kitchen, talking on the phone. You must believe the loss on your own. You must accept it without having said goodbye.

I never really knew my Yia-Yia. That’s not to say I didn’t hug her, or sit with her, or love her. No, I was very lucky. I had the privilege of growing up with her constant presence. When I say I didn’t know her, it’s because I never knew her favorite color, or if she liked peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, or if she preferred winter to summer. How it was when she first came to America? What was it like when she met my Pa-Pouli? What was her favorite movie? Did she like to swim? Those are all questions I never asked. When I say I didn’t know her, it’s because I never spoke with her.

If I’ve learned one thing in Ukraine, it’s the importance of language. When I was younger, I never grasped the point. In a room of people all speaking Greek, I was content to sit there without understanding a word. I knew when something was important, someone would lean in and whisper the English translation in my ear. Now that I’m older and have learned another language, I see what a horrible mistake that was. I see now that it was never a matter of understanding the language, but rather understanding the person.

Had I known Greek, I would have been able to ask my Yia-Yia all of those questions. We could have had discussions or told each other jokes. We might have even argued! I would have been able to tell her about myself, too. We might have had a lot in common. And not having that chance – never learning Greek – is something I will always regret.

This is what I do know… This is what I will remember… She baked Greek cookies all the time, and towards the end when her strength was waning, she still baked with the help of Pa-Pouli. She cooked thick noodles in red sauce that I never liked, but pretended to like. She made me oil and bread with salt every time I came over. She rubbed my back when I fell asleep watching cartoons. She cried when she was happy. She cried a lot. And when she died, the last words she heard were words of love.

And while it’s not everything – while it’s not the little puzzle-piece particulars of the soul that made her – I know that she loved and was loved.

I will remember her for that.

Holy Update, Batman!

Well, that was quite the delay!

I've been at site for almost three months now, and apart from generally settling in, my computer went and broke on me. That's been quite the disaster. I hate to say it, because I'd love to think that I could go back and hang out with Jane Austen and throw technology to the wind, but that's just not reality. I need me some tech. I love computers. Always have. And not having one is a hinderance. I can't plan lessons as I'd like to, I can't write, I can't watch movies, and - most importantly - I can't speak with my family and friends!

But, to bright-side this situation, I've been keeping productive! I'm almost done reading Anna Karenina. My flat is suspiciously clean. I've even done some push ups! And laundry...

Send help.

No, but after a mishap with the post office as far as getting a new computer sent to me, I've decided to buy one here. That will happen soon... I hope. I'm going to Lviv next week, so I suppose I'll check some out there, but who knows where I'll buy it from. Or how I'll buy it. I'm going to need a lot of help with that... I don't know any computer words in English, let alone Ukrainian. Speaking of speaking, my Ukrainian is getting better! At least I'm feeling better about it. I'm starting to read Harry Potter in Ukrainian. Or trying to, rather.

In more important update-y news, I love my site. My students are hilarious and brilliant and sassy. I'm working on being a better teacher every day, and I hope it's happening. I love the town. After traveling, it always feels like I'm really coming back home when I arrive in front of my flat. My counterpart is one of the most impressive people I've ever met. I'm so lucky to have been placed with her. We're already working on some projects for the school. I think we're going to do great things together, and either way, we'll have a lot of fun... Ah, and speaking of students, two of mine just sat down next to me in the computer cafe and they are watching me type. That's been a thing, they are all really interested in how fast I type. I tried explaining that they teach us typing in schools, it's like an actual class, but that didn't translate. Or they just don't believe me. Also, they have me rap for them often. These are two things I do just alright if I were to do them stateside (actually, if I were to rap stateside, I'd be thrown out), but at least I'm doing something that's cool to them. The novelty will surely wear off soon, and then I'll just be "that American" rather than "that fast-typing cool-rapping American" which I'm CERTAIN is what they call me when they're talking about me in Ukrainian. CERTAIN.

Anywho - I'm happy, I'm healthy, I'm gaining all sorts of weight. Life is good. And interesting. And always confusing and wacky and I love it.

Happy Updates, all!

Little Dragons

Go 'head and dust yo' shoulders off, Group 44!

We've officially been sworn in as United States Peace Corps Volunteers. My Ukrainian is at the intermediate mid-level. I've eaten calo. I've been in Ukraine for almost 90 days. It's wild, man.

I've been having quite the time. I'm constantly learning from the amazing people who've taken time out of their day to help me. Leaving my host family was difficult for that reason, because they were so incredibly attentive to me. But we're already keeping in touch. And now, I live in an apartment next door to my counterpart, and her family has taken me under their wing. Just now, I'm using two items that would've otherwise been useless to me without her husband's handy work. I have a lamp, I have a desk, I have a space-heather. Life is good.

My apartment is cool as can be, and I mean that in both the slang and actual meaning. It's cold. But again, space-heater! I'm super warm so long as I'm keeping it on.

I'm also going to miss my cluster mates. They were the best people I could've been placed with, and I'm happy to say that they're not terribly far away. I'll be seeing them soon, possibly for Christmas.

Here's a picture of us at Swearing In, making the Crazy-Nick face

Speaking of Christmas, I need to buy a tree. And maybe a guitar. I don't know, I saw one at the bazaar today, and I'm thinking it could be really fun to use a guitar in my lessons with the younger kids. Plus it'd be nice to hone that skill a bit more... We'll see, I was too scared to ask how much it was, and I'm not made of hryven after all!

Also, I have my own internet now. That means I should be able to keep up with this blog a bit more. Hopefully! I haven't met with the teachers at school, but just by talking with my counterpart, I know I'm going to be involved in a lot of real cool projects. I absolutely cannot wait!

Happy winter, all!

Super Good, Yes!

That's about all I know how to say in Ukrainian so far... This language is hard! But then again, all languages are hard for me. Slowly but surely, I'm picking it up.

My family is great! I play UNO with my host cestra Ina and her boyfriend Max every weekend. He tries to get me to say swear words in Ukrainian, but no way! You'll have to wake up pretty early to trick me into that! Haha, I did ask him the other day, "Max, what's your name?" My host family got a kick out of that.

Blogging is hard to keep up with, considering the amount of people I need to email. I'm going to try and do it every month! At least. Hopefully.

Loving life in Borova. This village is so welcoming.

Live long and prosper! Gosh, everything I'm writing is so spastic. It's okay. It's just the dubstep music of the Internet Cafe causing my adrenaline to rise.

The Jam Here is Incredible

Alright!

So, I made it to Ukraine. It's insanely awesome here. My host family is great, and my cluster is excellent. I'm having to fight off some fruit flies, but they're the most of my worries. Learning the language is going well. I have limited internet access, so this has to be a bit short. I want to update my friends all the time, but I feel like this is still a huge transition, and I want to hear about their lives but it's hard to have a full convo when they're asleep and you're awake.

The landscape here is actually JUST like Chicago. Flatlands, lots of planes. I'm literally next door to my teacher's home. We're in kind of like a dual house thing? Like two houses put together. I forget the word. And the other 4 volunteers in my cluster are right next door, we're all neighors, so I'm very close. The town bazzar is a 15 minute walk, so everything is nearby, and I'm never by myself. Again, this family is fantastic! So helpful and patient. I took my first shower today, and it was warm! Victory! My family has a dog named Charlie, and he's adorable. They also have a cat, but I forget its name. My host family makes everything from scratch, the food is fabulous. Their jam and juice is insanely good. I'm learning Ukrainian slowly... Very slowly... Baby steps.

I miss home, my family, my friends, Maddie... but I'm incredibly honored to be here. Being with such a loving and vibrant family helps.

Love from Borova!

My Aspiration Statement to Ukraine

ASPIRATION STATEMENT

Patricia N. Dalinis

Ukraine

September 17, 2012

A: The professional attributes that you plan to use, and what aspirations you hope to accomplish during your Peace Corps service:

I intend to approach my Peace Corps service with flexibility, excitement, creativity, and the understanding that I most likely have no idea what I’m getting myself into – and I mean that in the best way possible. My most essential professional attribute is the ability to learn as I go, to discover new methods of understanding by actively and consciously engaging myself. I do so openly and without judgment. To apply this to my service in Ukraine, I must listen to my students. I must work with them, allowing them to teach me as I in turn teach them. My time in Ukraine will be molded by the opportunities I’ve had here in Chicago. Through tutoring high school level ESL students, I’ve learned patience. I’ve learned to acknowledge what the student truly needs to learn without solely inflicting a pre-determined lesson plan on them. My interpersonal communication skills will be necessary in that respect. What’s great is that I was able to tutor the students on a wide variety of subjects, from History to English to Consumer education and more. This not only allowed the students to practice their English, but furthered their study in other subjects as well. As a teacher’s assistant, I’ve become familiar with both following lesson plans and creating them. Within these lessons, there has to be breathing room. Through flexible and creative lessons, the students will become active learners while I continue to maintain and enforce curriculum. I hope to communicate with other teachers, garnering knowledge from them while sharing my skills and findings. If I am able to accomplish the aforementioned goals, I will be successful in part of my aspirations for Peace Corps Service. I also want to work with the community to foster projects and developments that they need. There are about a hundred projects currently coming to mind that I would love to work on with my community, but I cannot know that they would actually be needed or appropriate. I’ll only know once I’m living and acclimating within the community. It’s important to me to help in a way that is genuinely needed, not only in the way I think is needed.

B: Your strategies for working effectively with host country partners to meet expressed needs:

Working effectively with host country partners will be integral to my Peace Corps service. By working closely together, we will foster a bond of cross-cultural understanding and respect. There are a few ways I intend to go about doing this. First, I will listen carefully to my partners when they tell me what the community needs. I will ask pertinent questions to better comprehend the issues at hand. I will be mindful of local norms, taking the time to adopt them as my own. I will present myself in the best way possible, always taking great care to portray a positive image of my home. I will also ask that people remain patient with me while I learn about the community, while I begin projects and while I further my language skills. I will welcome suggestions and seek out advice. By being personable, friendly, open and optimistic I will try hard to develop the type of communication that fosters good work between colleagues.

C: Your strategies for adapting to a new culture with respect to our your own cultural background:

The best way to adapt to a new culture is to immerse oneself in that culture. I look forward to discovering first hand all of the things that make Ukraine such a fascinating place. By being curious and flexible, I hope for Ukraine to become a part of my cultural background. Of course, I still intend to maintain who I am by keeping up with activities I enjoy, such as writing, drawing, and reading. Luckily for me, those activities are pretty portable. I hope to share those interests with the people around me as we all learn more about each other. It’s all about an exchange in cultural understanding. I know there may be some aspects of culture that might be uncomfortable for me at first, but it comes down to adjustment and compromise. By remaining open and respectful I will overcome those obstacles to the best of my ability. I’m also pretty excited to experience the religious holidays of the area, as I am of the same religion. Being Orthodox, I look forward to seeing how religion factors into the lives of Ukrainian people. While I’m not very religious myself, it is nonetheless fascinating to look into a culture that I may otherwise have no ties to, but still find that we share something so familiar.

D: The skills and knowledge you hope to gain during pre-service training to best serve your future community project: 

I’m looking forward to the information and many skills I will develop through pre-service training. In order to be proactive, I’ve thoroughly read through the handbooks on safety, Ukraine, and being a volunteer in general, as well as worked on the language preparation activities available online. But the hands on training I’ll be receiving the first three months in-country will set the tone for my two years of service. I hope to tackle the language most importantly, whether it is Ukrainian or Russian. It’s vital for me to be able to properly communicate with the people around me as best as I can. I also want to learn about how to keep safe as a volunteer. There are many steps I can take myself to ensure my own safety, and I want to make sure to take responsibility for that with the help of the safety training I’ll receive. I am also very excited to learn about the culture and history of Ukraine, specifically whatever village or town I’ll be assigned to. I want to come into my assignment with a basic understanding of the area and the people, so that I can better observe and assess the needs of the community.

E: How you think Peace Corps service will influence your personal and professional aspirations after your service ends: 

The Peace Corps will be the defining experience of my life. It is impossible for it not to be. My views and goals will undoubtedly change drastically. I could guess at what they’ll be when I finish my two year service, but I cannot know for sure what they’ll look like. I imagine they’ll consist of a strong passion for teaching, for learning, for working with youth. I would love to work on developing literacy and creative writing programs to foster a love of literature in youth culture. I hope to have a chance to do so in Ukraine. But I may also find myself working on HIV seminars or summer camps or something unexpected but equally wonderful. These experiences may shift my outlook on what I want to accomplish when I come back to Chicago in 2014. Still, no matter what direction I take, my time with the Peace Corps will help me become a more socially conscious, thoughtful, independent and motivated human being.

Land on the Edge

That's the literal translation of the word "Ukraine." And that's literally where I'm headed. To the edge!

That's right!!! My invitation was patiently waiting on my doorstep when I arrived home from work this afternoon. Rejoice! Ukraine, baby! I'm going to learn to say "Ukraine, baby" in Ukrainian, and that's all anyone's going to hear from me for the next three months. Україна, дитинко! It's going to get so annoying for everyone, they'll be begging me to leave.

Speaking of which, lots to do! Lots of forms to fill out, lots of things to buy, lots of research to search. I can't believe I know where I'm headed. It's the best feeling. A lot of the application process can feel directionless. For a long time, you're working towards some abstract, untouchable speck on the horizon. You know the idea of it. The prospect of what it all could be. But you don't really know. You never know! And then suddenly you do and you can point it out on a map! It's like putting a face to a name. It's like putting a feeling to a place.

And quite a glorious place, at that! 


I'm excited. I shouldn't get too ahead of myself with my annoyingly unflinching optimism. I know Ukraine will certainly have its pros and cons. But it's all about brightsiding, am I right?!

I'm right.